Their dads have been there for them since Day One. Meaning the day they were conceived, not the day they were born. Obviously, the more Daddy has been involved in the child's life, the more attached the child is to Daddy.
Tee is very attached to her Daddy. Her Daddy used to talk to her since she was a little beany. And he continued talking to her everyday till she was born. She would kick in excitement every time she heard his voice and this didn't happen with other voices. Then from the day she was born, they always had their Daddy-Baby time where she'd sleep on his chest and stomach and do things together. He'd take her for walks, play with her, bathe her, feed her, you name it, he did it.After 5 years of Daddy caring, Tee is completely in love with her Dad and wants to marry him. Tsk-tsk.....how incestuous. I did some research on attachment to fathers out of curiosity and these are my findings.
- A child does not necessarily need a father although a great father present in a child's life would be ideal However, if he is a lousy father, then it's better to do without him. Single parenthood is totally OK. But if a child who has a great father loses him for whatever reason, the child will suffer.
- For a child to develop normally socially and emotionally well, she needs to be exposed to some kind of attachment parenting (mother, father or better, both) from birth till optimally 3 years of age. If this has not happened, it will be more of an effort to instill this attachment to a child during the later years. Children who get much response and love from their parent(s) from birth to 3 years old, are at the front line to having a stable and happy life. Having said this, many things can go wrong from there should there be negative external factors influencing the child like the parents start fighting or if the child is neglected etc.
- Being attached to the father is one thing. Being securely attached is another. This can be measured by the way your child greets her father after a separation and whether she tells him about what happened during the separation time. I praise the Lord that Tee's body shoots out a lightbulb spark every time she sees me after a separation despite my being the Dragon Mommy and she does tell me about her day very openly and happily. Thank you, God. She also ran to her Daddy at the airport at full speed after not seeing him for 2 weeks when we went to Australia. And they kissed each other for the next hour. Gross.
- Mother and Daughter relationships are easilly passed down. This is what I feared most but thankfully, I seem to have managed to break the pattern thus far.
Posts
