Toddlers not drinking water!

Tee has always detested drinking. It's genetic. My mother doesn't get thirsty. Neither do I. We literally have to set alarm clocks to remind us to drink. So when Tee started showing signs of not drinking (apart from milk), I was worried. People suggested I gave her juice or sweeter drinks. That didn't work. She is just not a drinker!

So how do I get her to drink?

Now that she is in her Terrible Three's (What, you think it stops at Two? Let me tell you, it goes beyond Three! Even Four!!!), she is purposely rejecting drinking water because she is just the little rebel that she is. I have a very willful child. The female version of Billy Idol.

Due to her pure willfulness, whenever I ask her if she'd like to drink, she'd automatically say no. Her mouth is already programmed that way. Second strategy. Don't ask. Say DRINK. It doesn't work. She will still not drink. Why should she do what Mommy tells her to. She'll do what she wants, when she wants. When you have a toddler like mine, no amount of caning, spanking, scolding, time-outs (not that I give her any of these, apart from scoldings and time-outs) will make her do what she does not want to do. I am not kidding.

After pure observation, the Hubs has identified that we need to put water in front of her lips when she is busy doing something. When she is in the midst of a jigsaw puzzle, or building a tower, or drawing.......we place some water with a straw in front of her. Tada!!! It works. She drinks! I'm not sure if it's because there is no request to drink and water is just placed in front of her mouth that she drinks or whether she is busy concentrating on the task at hand that she just wants you out of her face as soon as possible, so she drinks to make you happy so you'd just go away. Whatever the reason, it works for us.

So as hard as it is that we have to be on the ball to see when she is busy to feed her with liquids, we'd rather not have her dehydrated. Sometimes we resort to threats. Like tell her she will lose a toy if she doesn't drink. But sometimes that backfires as she will say, OK. You can take the toy. *smile*

More tips on how to make your toddler drink water and fluids.

Consequences of hitting your children

To discuss children and spanking, please move over to my post here about why you should not hit children.

Making lifetime friends from young

Read about Tee, my toddler making lifetime friends.

Handling rejection in toddlers

What? You mean three year olds are actually capable of handling such emotional issues?

You bet!

Tee, my very vocal and direct daughter, is best friends with a girl three months her senior whom she started school with at the same time. They have been best friends at school, always looking forward to seeing one another every morning, always looking out for each other and having the times of their lives together. As first friends, as best friends.

This week however, my girl decided that she liked someone else better, best friend's elder sister. AND she told her best friend this straight to her face. Best friend was visibly hurt and went home crying to her mother, asking why Tee preferred somebody else to her. She thought they were best friends!

Today, when I dropped Tee off at school, best friend came up to me to ask why Tee preferred her older sister to her. The question stunned me.

So I quickly responded that sometimes, people like older people because they look up to them. It doesn't mean they don't like the younger people and some day, she would have younger people liking her more too. Weak, I know......

I didn't have time to talk to her as I was rushing off so perhaps I will have a chat with her again tomorrow to explain that sometimes, people have different likes and these likes are subject to change at anytime. Just how she may like carrots today and not tomorrow.

What would you have said?

The five corners for your toddler

Five corners? Well, you don't exactly need a pentagon layout for this but early childhood educators suggest that to optimise your toddler's development, your home should be set up in the following manner. If space is a problem, fret not. You can always improvise.

The five corners are:

1. The Physical Corner - this is an area where your toddler can climb, jump, dance, crawl and be a monkey. Only in this corner is she allowed to explore her physical exploits, so make it safe. To further enhance this area, create mini obstacle course like activities for her to explore. Have her throw balls into hula hoops, walk on ropes (on the ground), jump from a step etc. In our home, we have a mini bouncy castle, all her vehicles, a basketball hoop, a skipping rope and she moves her furniture around to make her own obstacle course. It's really role-playing for her as she builds bridges from chairs and tables as tunnels.


2. The Arts and Craft Corner - this is where your toddler gets to express her creativity in it's free-est form. Let her paint, colour, stick, cut and experiment with different textures and materials. Let her get messy and sticky and icky. Also you may want to rotate her tools. For example, one month is colour pencils month. The next is crayons, the next finger paints etc. The duration can also lessen depending on your toddler's attention span. We have an easel in our study where she has all her tools in one corner. Only when she wants to paint does she have to ask me and I will set up a large plastic mat on the floor and prepare her painting water, brushes, art block, paint and apron. I also make it a point that whenever she is finished, that she has to clean up. It's good to start this habit young. You can get nice big A2 sized art blocks from Popular Book Store costing RM10 each for 20 pages but because the pages are so big, they actually take longer to go through them. Well worth it!!! Also, if your toddler comes up with a masterpiece, an A2 good quality piece of paper is worth framing.
3. The Educational Toys Corner - this is a place for your toddler to play building blocks, jigsaw puzzles, and any other toys that allows him to explore his creativity and allows him to think. According to early childhood educators again, if you want to create a smart toddler, then buy him only toys that he can make things out of. The best toys you can get your toddler is a set of building blocks. Or even cereal which he can make shapes and letters out of, or pieces of paper cut out in various rectangular shapes. It doesn't have to cost a lot of money. Even rubberbands are considered educational toys.
4. The Home Centre - toddlers love emulating their parents so have a corner for all things home like a toy kitchen and really anything else, that you have in your home. You do not have to buy toys for this purpose and can really use whatever you have already at home to set up this corner. My daughter is tremendously spoilt by her grandmother so she has not only a toy kitchen but a toy baby high chair, a toy baby mop and broom, a toy hoover, a toy kettle, a toy toaster, a toy trolley, a supermarket trolley, a bicycle, a car, a potty for her doll, a toy crib........you know what? She has everything! *roll eyeballs*
5. The Thinking Corner - this is where your toddler is sent to think. Think about her behaviour whenever she is disobedient, or if she has done something very wrong. Toddlers hate this corner and there is a rule of thumb to measure the time that a toddler is meant to stay at the thinking corner (1 minute for every year of age) but I prefer to play it by ear and see how sorry she looks and the amount of apologies that she offers. *wink* The thinking corner or chair or step is very necessary though in toddler development.
6. The Reading Corner is actually left out but I've added this in myself because we have one at home. This is a place where Tee chooses her own books and brings them to me to read to her or goes through them herself. Reading must be inculcated young. Do teach your children to respect books. They need to be reminded constantly, so no stepping on books!

For your information, this is how the better schools in town are set up. This is because toddlers do not have the capacity yet to follow instructions fully and focus on a task at hand. Thus good pre-schools have these corners so at any one time, toddlers can roam about to do whatever they wish despite the fact that lessons are going on. Just because a toddler is painting doesn't mean she is not listening to what the teacher is saying. She is still absorbing everything.

This style of teaching goes right up to eight years old as can be observed in International schools locally or good pre-schools.

Toddlers are fearless!

One thing I've experienced with a three year old is that they love pushing buttons. Yeah, they loved pushing them since they started getting the hang of their motor skills, but at three, they're REALLY pushing them. Your buttons.

They will test, test, and test......just to see how far you would go as a parent.

For example, "Go to the corner!"

"NO!"

"Go to the corner now!"

"NO!!"

"I said, GO to the corner!"

"NO!!!"

What do you do then? Well, don't do nothing! Show them who's really boss and take them to the corner. You will be faced with resistance, of course.

I lie. You will be faced with a screaming, kicking octopus that refuses to be laid on your next pasta dish. Whatever you do, don't give in.

Toddlers need boundaries.

If not, statistics have shown that children without boundaries have ill-effects later on in life. They become insecure. They have relationship problems because they are not equipped with the proper skills in selecting a right partner. They don't know right from wrong. From being so cocooned in their ideal world, they are suddenly thrown into the real world thus, you will not be doing your child any favours by giving in to him. Tough love, it's called. If you truly love them.

Don't turn your child into a victim just because YOU have issues. Do what's best for them. In the most loving way you know how.

A new beginning for Tee and Me

Today marks the day for new beginnings. Why today, you may ask….


Well, today, my three year old convinced me that she really was a confident, bossy little Missy by role-playing a teacher at a friend’s home. The friend had a tuition centre renovated into his home and Tee loved it. She took on the role as teacer so naturally and ordered the above 40’s around the classroom. And taught them. Taught them (men) how to use moisturiser. The proper way.


Then she taught them how to cure a cough.


Her animation and hand actions were just amazing. And her articulation superb. Our hosts were so in awe of her that I knew I had done something right.


Hence, to share all the little activities that we do or have done at home and elsewhere, I am starting this to exactly communicate that. I know that not all mothers have the time nor the inclination nor the imagination to think up such activities with their tots but if you so happen to want to do something one fine day, you are most welcomed to draw from our ideas. I will categorise this blog into age groups so you can click on a particular age group for an activity. It’s just the beginning but be patient, we’ll get there.


For now, let’s celebrate the incredible joy of having a toddler!!!